EQ (emotional intelligence) is more than just being an empathetic person.
Emotional intelligence relies on two important factors. One, self awareness of your emotional state and the ability to communicate it. And two, accurately interpreting the emotional state of others, so you can help meet their needs.
But this isn’t enough. The secret lies in integrating the pursuit of your own emotional needs along with the needs of others, so that we all win.
In romantic partnerships, one person never wins. When that happens, both (or all) people lose. When partners compete with each other that way that’s when bad things happen.
But when partners align their efforts to face problems together, that’s when bonds are strengthened and matured.
Win-win outcomes are what healthy relationships are all about. That’s not to say they’re always sunshine-and-rainbow outcomes for everybody. But the results are a net benefit for the relationship and each other, rather than one person coming out on top.
The wider, big picture view that benefits everyone is the essence of emotional intelligence.